I am FIERCE

I am DETERMINED.


I REFUSE to live surrounded by things I've outlived.


Space Clearing - said to be the first and most important step in the 21-step Feng Shui process - means "Sorting out one's LIFE by Sorting through one's CLUTTER".


The most emotionally-challenging things for me to part with are Mom's --- mainly, the beautifully handmade clothing she designed and custom-tailored for me, with love. So many memories come rushing back, just fingering each garment:
- the red dotted Swiss floor-length gown worn to my first high school dance ... Pops kindly took pictures of me holding this beauty, with its glorious scooped neckline, customized snap-in bra strap holders (no fidgeting!), softly flowing triple-tiered skirt and seams hidden by two-inch-wide white crocheted lace, and full, cuffed, see-through sleeves. Fingering it brought a warm smile to my face as I recalled the excitement K, L & I felt as we tripled with the fellows we'd asked to attend the Girls' Choice. Personally, I thought my fellow was sooo glamorous - he was a spotlight seeker and quite cocky (I realized too late) in school, though he was very polite and ever the gentleman on our big night - but he hurt me deeply the following week in our drama class when he announced to our teacher and others that another girl (whom he had seen at the dance) was "a real lady" with her thin frame and "slim" white dress that made her look "utterly regal". When pressed as to how he had enjoyed himself, he sidestepped the question by stating simply that he had gone. Ouch!

Well, "utterly regal" is one phrase that will likely never describe me. Even now, these 32 years later, I would change nothing about that night and the fun we SIX had (and YEAH, that thoughtless jerk was laughing and joking and dancing and eating right along with the rest of us 5!) ... I especially wouldn't change my gorgeous, elegant, Christmas-red dotted Swiss gown!

I guess when it comes right down to it, the only things I would've changed were being within earshot of my date's thoughtless comments and enduring the subsequent hurt feelings afterward.

I'll add these photos to those taken so long ago, so that each time I go reminiscing through my scrapbook, I can remember Mom's painstaking hours of love, her joy - and mine as I wore it, and RESOLVE for my decision to donate it and other cherised items of clothing for others' enjoyment and use.


I am FIERCE.